A friend recently told me to let myself heal. My response was,”How can I heal that which I never had?”. My ENTIRE life consists of various types of violence, abuse, then learning to stand up for myself. This thought is consuming me.
I’ve never been “Alone”. Completely alone, not even any family around. I’m contemplating the troublesome question. “HOW CAN I HEAL THAT WHICH I NEVER HAD?”. I then think to a time when I had a good job with the state, my own apt. I was me. Alone, but family living just minutes away. I’m coming to a very good understanding about what it means to have ABSOLUTELY nobody who cares whether you’re dead or alive.
First thing I must do is to revisit the independent me, living alone; by myself. Then work my way up from there.